Barts Crank Calls
Bart with Lisa and Maggie
Moe: Phone call for Al...Al Coholic...is there an Al Coholic here?Wait a minute...
Moe: Listen, you little yellow-bellied rat jackass, if I ever find out who you are, I'm gonna kill you!
Bart and Lisa laugh
Bart with Lisa and Maggie
Oliver Clothesoff! Call for Oliver Clothesoff!
Marge picks up the extension and hears:
Listen, you lousy bum, if I ever get a hold of you, I swear I'll cut your belly open!
Bart with Lisa
Bart: Uh, is I.P. Freely here?
Moe:Hey, everybody, I.P. Freely!Wait a minute...
Moe:Listen to me you lousy bum. When I get a hold of you, you're dead. I swear I'm gonna slice your heart in half!
Bart and Lisa laugh
Bart with Lisa
Moe:Uh, Jacques Strap! Hey guys, I'm looking for a Jacques Strap!Oh, wait a minute...Jacques Strap
Moe:It's you isn't it ya cowardly little runt? When I get a hold of you, I'm gonna gut you like a fish and drink your blood!
Bart laughs
Bart with Lisa
Bart: Hey, is there a Butz here? Seymour Butz?
Moe: Hey, everybody, I wanna Seymour Butz!Oh, wait a minute...
Moe: Listen, you little scum-sucking pus-bucket! When I get my hands on you, I'm gonna put out your eyeballs with a corkscrew!
Bart and Lisa laugh
Bart (in Principal Skinner's office)
Moe:Uh, Homer Sexual? Aw, come on, come on, one of you guys has gotta be Homer Sexual!
Homer says: "Don't look at me!"
Moe:Oh, no...
Moe:You rotten little punk! If I ever get a hold of you, I'll sink my teeth into your cheek and rip your face off!
Skinner: (on the other end of the line) You'll do what, young man?
Bart
Moe: Bea O'Problem! Bea O'Problem! Come on, guys, do I have a Bea O'Problem here?
Barney says "You sure do!"
Moe: Oh...it's you, isn't it?
Moe: Listen, you. When I get a hold of you, I'm going to use your head for a bucket and paint my house with your brains!
Bart laughs
Bart
Moe:Uh, Amanda Huggenkiss? Hey, I'm looking for Amanda Huggenkiss! Ah, why can't I find Amanda Huggenkiss?
Barney says "Maybe your standards are too high!"
Moe: You little S.O.B.! Why, when I find out who you are, I'm going to shove a sausage down your throat and stick starving dogs in your butt!
Laura Powers with Bart
Moe: Ivana Tinkle? Ivana Tankle? All right, everybody, put down your glasses, Ivana Tinkle!
Laura and Bart laugh
Back to the Simpsons Main Page